Tag Archives: spoon

The Spoon.?

Timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
organization.
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.
It seemed a little strange.
When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, “Why the spoon?”
“Well,” he explained, “the restaurant’s owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon
was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop
frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.”
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able
to replace it with his spare. “I’ll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.”
I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of
the waiter’s fly.
Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string
hanging from their
flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter, “Excuse me, but
can you tell me
why you have that string right there?”

“Oh, certainly!” Then he lowered his voice. “Not everyone is so observant.
That consulting
firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom.
By tying this
string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without
touching it and eliminate
the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the
restroom by
76.39 percent.”
I asked “After you get it out, how do you put it back?”

“Well,” he whispered, “I don’t know about the others, but I use the spoon.

Hygienic waiter………………………………………?

A man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a clean spoon, and set it on the table.
The diner was impressed. “Do all the waiters here carry spoons in their pockets?”
The waiter replied, “Yes. Ever since an Efficiency Expert visited our restaurant… He determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying clean spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen.”
The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, “Forgive the intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?”
The waiter replied, “Yes, we all do. Seems that the same Efficiency Expert determined that we spend to much time washing our hands after using the men’s room. So, the other end of that string is tied to my penis. When I need to go, I simply pull the string, do my thing, and then return to work. Having never touched myself, there really is no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time.”
“Wait a minute,” said the diner, “how do you get your penis back in your pants?”
“Well, I don’t know about the other guys, but I use the spoon.”

Up for a DIRTY JOKE, anyone??

A man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a clean spoon, and set it on the table. The diner was impressed. “Do all the waiters here carry spoons in their pockets?”

The waiter replied, “Yes. Ever since an Efficiency Expert visited our restaurant… He determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying clean spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen.”

The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, “Forgive the intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?”

The waiter replied, “Yes, we all do. Seems that the same Efficiency Expert determined that we spend to much time washing our hands after using the men’s room. So, the other end of that string is tied to my penis. When I need to go, I simply pull the string, do my thing, and then return to work. Having never touched myself, there really is no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time.”

“Wait a minute,” said the diner, “how do you get your penis back in your pants?”

“Well, I don’t know about the other guys, but I use the spoon.”

An oldie naughty joke – bit long but worth a laugh?

This man entered a restaurant, as he sat down he knocked the spoon off the table accidentally. Then a nearby waiter, pulled out a clean spoon from his pocket and set it on the table. The diner was impressed. “Do you all carry spoons in their pockets?” The waiter replied, “Yes. Ever since we had that efficiency expert out, he determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen.”
The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, “Forgive the intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?” The waiter replied, “Yes, we all do, the same efficiency expert determined that we spend too much time washing our hands after using the men’s room. So, the other end of that string is tied to my manhood. When I need to go, I simply pull the string to it out, go, and return to work. Since I don’t actually touch myself, no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time.”
“But,” said the diner. “How do you get it back in your pants?”
“Well, I don’t know about the other guys, I use the spoon.”

HA HA!!! Another funny one!?

A man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a clean spoon, and set it on the table. The diner was impressed. “Do all the waiters here carry spoons in their pockets?”

The waiter replied, “Yes. Ever since an Efficiency Expert visited our restaurant… He determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying clean spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen.”

The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, “Forgive the intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?”

The waiter replied, “Yes, we all do. Seems that the same Efficiency Expert determined that we spend to much time washing our hands after using the men’s room. So, the other end of that string is tied to my penis. When I need to go, I simply pull the string, do my thing, and then return to work. Having never touched myself, there really is no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time.”

“Wait a minute,” said the diner, “how do you get your penis back in your pants?”

“Well, I don’t know about the other guys, but I use the spoon.”