Tag Archives: guy

weird dreams of a normal guy??what you say??

Posted on March 18, 2012 by admin| 11 Comments

I’m just a normal guy, just as plain as one can be.
My Mum & Dad were average folks, & that’s how they raised me
I don’t understand it, it’s to normal things I’m geared
By day my life is sane, but at night my dreams are weird

I’m just a normal fella who goes off to work each day
I do my job, lunch with my mates, each week collect my pay
But in the night I dread the bed, each night is just the same
Cause all my dreams are kinky, one overnight sick game.

I’m dressed in a G-string tied in a bow
There’s a chicken in a garter belt, Oh God no!
Birds fly by and wolf whistle overhead
Don’t roll over there’s a roo in the bed …

15 Strippers all in a row
All with bra-straps ready to blow
One pretty lady dancin’ in my lap
Don’t you touch or you’ll get a nasty slap.
I’d like to have a girlfriend, but it just never does work out
We get on fine until they find what my night dreams are about
Then they drop me like a stone, they say they can’t compete
With nude three-breasted women with vibrators on their feet

Hippos in tutus, hot oil & cream
Chains and whips all to make me scream
Lizards & snakes all in strange places
They’re gettin’ it on & making lewd faces
I’m just a normal guy, just as plain as one can be.
My Mum & Dad were average folks, & that’s how they raised me
My life could be near perfect, my life could be real fun
If only when I slept the chorus girls weren’t dressed like nuns

I went to see a famous shrink, to straighten out my head
I told him if I can’t get fixed I might as well be dead
He laid me down & said “tell me of your erotic dreams”
I said “One feather is erotic, not whole chickens soaked in cream!”

There are female wrestlers all covered in jelly
Exotic dancers doing things with their bellies
A cute sexy lady, covered in mud
Whispers in my ear with the voice of Elmer Fudd
I guess it is my lot to life, can’t beat it so I’ll join
I suppose that they are only dreams they don’t even cost a coin
So if at night you happen to hear me in my sleep
Just think, “that lucky bugger, is dancing naked tending sheep.”

I’m just a normal guy, just as plain as one can be.
My Mum & Dad were average folks, & that’s how they raised me
I don’t under stand it, it’s to normal things I’m geared
By day my life is sane, but at night my dreams are weird
THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH THAT WAS ME!!!

Snow kid..

and if course if you like my poem GIMMME A STAR!!…

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What kind of pisser are you? List available for men, women pls make your own list,,?

Posted on March 13, 2012 by admin| 7 Comments

I’m more of the tough guy type,,,

Absent Minded: Opens his vest, pulls out his tie, and pisses in his pants.

Clever: Uses no hands, shows off by fixing tie with both hands, looks around for admiration, and sometimes ends up pissing on the floor and onto his shoes.

Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on the left, pisses into the one in the center, and flushes the one on the right.

Desperate: Waits in a long time, teeth floating and feet shuffling. Starts to piss as he walks up to urinal but before he can unzip himself. Lets out a long groan and grunt as he finally gets to relieve himself.

Disgruntled: Stands for a while, grunts, gives up, and walks away.

Drunk: Holds left thumb in right hand and pisses into his pants.

Easily induced: Any thought, mention, sight, or slosh of a liquid, from sipping coffee to a runny nose, causes bladder to immediately signal full condition.

Efficient: Waits until he has to crap, then does both at once.

Erect: Either because his bladder is full or he just saw a sexy woman, his penis is so erect that he must thrust his buttocks backward a bit to be able to pull his member out of his pants. Gets pubic hair caught up in his zipper.

Excitable: Shorts half twisted around, cannot find the hole, and ends up ripping his shorts or jamming the zipper into his shirttail.

Flashy: Tells loud jokes while pissing; shakes off drops with a great flourish.

Frivolous: Plays stream up and down and across the urinal. Likes to see how many bubbles he can make froth up. Tries to hit and sink the cigarette floating around in the water. Has never really grown up.

Indifferent: If all the urinals are being used, he goes into a toilet stall to piss. If all the toilet stalls are taken also, he pisses into the sink or garbage can.

Little: Stands on a box to piss into the urinal, falls in, drowns.

Nosey: Looks into the next urinal to compare himself with the other guy’s organ.

Patient: Stands very close for a long time waiting, reading the paper with his free hand.

Playful: Spots a friend’s shoes under the divider wall and redirects aim accordingly.

Scientific: Backs up from the urinal to take a long shot, misses, and pisses on shoes.

Slob: Does not bother to flush urinal after using it, drips all over his shoes and pants when zipping himself back up, and does not bother to wash hands as he leaves with his fly undone. Usually has to adjust his balls afterwards as he is sitting down.

Sneak: Farts silently while pissing, acts very innocent, and knows that the man next to him will be blamed.

Sociable: Joins friends in piss whether he has to go or not.

Timid: Cannot urinate if someone is watching, pretends to, and then flushes the urinal as if he has already used it. Sneaks back in once everyone has left the restroom.

Tough: Bangs dick against side of urinal to dry it.

Worried: Is not sure of what he has been into lately and makes a quick inspection.

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i need to know if this guy is giving up on his old best friend (a girl) or more than a friend (me)?

Posted on March 7, 2012 by admin| 2 Comments

For the last time, I don’t care if it’s not the right kind of poetry, whatever, I didn’t write it. All I want to know is what it means. I know I post these a lot, but I never get enough responses, so please help me out here!! and details!

Oh, Beautiful Parasite!

Here is a box, yes it is for you.
Filled with green grasses,
but sadly that’s not the truth.
Father, look deeper and your thoughts may explode,
in a time capsule the blindman had been shown.

Time after space, space before grace,
but no true mark or unit,
the forefront of an unrecognizable face.
Child, not alone to wonder will you find the roots,
the ones that keep buried the secrets in their shoots.

Falling into the sky, thinking this shouldn’t be goodbye,
riding on the underside of a silver star,
you’re right; it doesn’t bring the want to rise.
Mother, look! Your son! Can’t you see it’s me in disguise?
These weeds that clutter your mind?
These droplets making rain arise?
These ions changing the boulder that flies,
these diamonds coming from the ore that cries?
These pieces of porcelain falling from such great heights,
these inevitable circles formed from innumerable lines,
these curtains revealing such darkness that blinds,
these seeds of which breath leads air to bind,
these winds grinding the cage that abides,
these ashes fueling the fire that tries?
And yet through the blackened sky,
my blows to the window I repeatedly applied,
still weren’t enough to break the ties,
the kept your heart sealed within the case in which you died.
9 hours ago – 3 days left to answer.
Additional Details
9 hours ago

The guy I like wrote this, and idk if it’s about me. This got no ansers in poetry, so I’m trying it here. Real answers only please.
Okay well here’s some details then. Me and this guy liked each other last year and we went to homecoming together, whatever. But we were both really shy and weren’t really doing anything about it. So he told his friends that I never made any moves. And recently stuff has happened… but I think he’s just moving on… and so am I… but I still want to know.

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Okay…….?

Posted on February 12, 2012 by admin| 1 Comment

Im lyk a social buttery fly but around this guy i get tounge tied
I’ve talked to him but he didnt talk much
one of his friends said he lyked me
and i can tell when he has his eyes on me
i glance at him and he is looking at me
he talks to people and some of my friends but they asked who he lyked and he didn’t answer
but when i try to talk to him once in a while he just looks around and talks a little

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what’s your worst dining experience?

Posted on January 23, 2012 by admin| 4 Comments

i was in Steak n’ Ale in one of their smaller rooms…….. at the large table everyone was really tying one on. the guy at the head of the table started laughing so hard, he choked on his food. some guy did the hemlick manuever and the food and vomit came flying out. it was projectile vomit and his head was spinning. we scurried out…. i found out from a friend that worked there that the group sortof cleaned the mess up and kept eating.

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